I originally wrote this blog a few weeks ago when things had calmed down. Before I had a chance to publish it I was swept up in another few weeks of frenzied activity.
What a crazy few months I had. When I started to feel better and gained some clarity I decided to get off my arse and get a job. I updated my CV and put it online. I wanted a part-time job so that I could focus on building up the business again.
The day after I uploaded my CV I had a call from a recruitment consultant about a job. It was a full-time role but my gut instinct was to be open to it, so I agreed that the consultant could put me forward. A couple of days later I had a telephone interview.
During the interview I was surprised to learn the hours were 7.30 am – 5 pm. I was also surprised and dismayed to find out that there was a ‘no trouser’ policy for all female members of staff i.e. all females must wear skirts or dresses, there was no swearing permitted at work, no talking unless it was related to the job in hand and the company’s values included obedience. I very nearly voiced my concerns and said that I didn’t think I was the right fit for this role. Instead I nodded and smiled and said that it all sounded wonderful. My friends thought it was very funny and said that it would never last.
The face to face interview went well and I was offered the position on the same day, even though they usually do two interviews. In spite of my misgivings my gut instinct was to accept the offer and so I did.
I felt this was an excellent opportunity to work on self-discipline, which is something I lack. I knew that if I was to survive working those hours I would need to have a routine and healthy habits in place. I also knew it would be good for the rebel in me to learn how to behave in a work environment. I have a history of complaining and being difficult, mainly as I resent being told what to do. I decided that in this role I would take ownership of any problems that arose and avoid being difficult or blaming others. This was hard and I had to constantly remind myself to behave.
My routine included chanting every day, which helped me to focus on invoking my Buddhahood (wisdom, courage and compassion) and seeing Buddhahood in others. When people annoyed me I chanted for their happiness.
Very quickly I confirmed what I already knew; that I was ill suited to employment. I decided to make a plan to get my business up and running again and in the meantime give 100% to my job.
‘Mr. Toda [Second President of the SGI*] said that the most important thing is to first become an indispensable person wherever you are. Instead of moaning over the fact that a job is different from what you’d like to be doing, he said, become a first-class individual at that job. This will open the path leading to the next phase in your life, during which you should also continue doing your best. Such continuous efforts will absolutely land you a job that you like, one that supports your life, and allows you to also contribute to society.’ – sgi.org
Unfortunately, or fortunately, as the case may be, I was given a week’s notice after seven weeks of working there. I have to admit I was very happy and struggled to hide my glee. So finding myself unemployed, I focused on building up my business. The initial glee wore off as I started to worry about how I could support myself and pay off my rent arrears and debts.
I reminded myself there is always a solution to every challenging situation and with my Buddhist practice I can make the impossible possible. Although I could not see any way I could earn enough money and have sufficient time to work on the business, I had faith that the answer would come.
Within two days I was offered an amazing business opportunity with low investment and low risk. I am now a partner in an exciting new business venture: Local Values. This new business fits perfectly with my current business: Suffolk Social Media and gives me the opportunity to support local, independent businesses.
This turn of events leaves me feeling awe-inspired and grateful at the power of my positive thinking, my Buddhist practice and the Universe. I love the new venture and every day I wake up feeling excited and eager to start work.
My friends and boyfriend have been incredibly supportive. I am truly blessed to have such amazing people in my life. Thank you.
Although my income has increased as a result of the new business, I still have some money concerns and I remind myself to focus on love and gratitude instead of fear and trust that abundance will come.
*SGI – Sokka Gakkai International, a socially engaged Buddhist organisation. sgi.org