Learn to Be Happy
“Meditation is evolution’s strategy to bring out our full potential.” – Tara Brach
I’ve been practising meditation for so long that I assume that everyone vaguely interested in spirituality meditates and knows how to meditate. I have been surprised a couple of times lately when people have told me that they don’t meditate, or they don’t know how to meditate.
In my experience, meditation is one of the most important keys to mental health and well-being.
“If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself, and then make a change.” – Michael Jackson, “Man in the Mirror”
At some point in my journey, it dawned on me that although I had friends who cared about me, in reality, the only person I could fully count on was myself. After continually being let down by friends and being estranged from my family, I felt quite depressed. I felt that no one really gave a sh*t about me.
My friend Paul pointed out that it wasn’t my friends that were making me unhappy, it was my expectations of them. After a while, I realised that I was responsible for my own Happiness, and I wasn’t responsible for anyone else’s. It was such a relief!
Continue reading “Take Responsibility and Change Your Story”
As I mentioned in my previous post, feeling the pain is a great way to deal with difficult emotions, but what can you do when feeling the pain doesn’t work?
I still experience periods of depression. Usually, they pass quickly, but occasionally they linger.
Sometimes the emotions were so painful I had even considered suicide. But the truth is, I didn’t want to die, I just wanted the pain to stop. During one period of depression, I had an “aha” moment when I realised I had fallen into the trap of not just feeling the pain but dwelling on it. I had become stuck in a pattern of thinking and talking about being depressed. I had to focus on what I wanted instead of focusing on what I didn’t want. I had to change my story.
My regular Happiness practices such as Buddhist chanting, gratitude, meditation, Thought Field Therapy (TFT) – which releases blocked energy by tapping on acupressure points and is also called tapping – and other techniques can all be useful to avoid getting sucked into a vortex of negativity. Remember though, it’s vital to allow ourselves to feel the pain before we use other Happiness techniques. It can be a tricky balancing act.
In her video “What to Do If You Feel Hopeless,” Teal Swan says, “Whatever you do, don’t try to think positive thoughts. Don’t write a single affirmation. Anything you try hard to do to get out of the feeling of hopelessness will ensnare you deeper.”
“Some people think to be strong is to never feel pain. However the strongest people are the ones that have felt pain, understood it, accepted it and learned from it.”
– Charlotte Dawson
We often think we will be Happy when we get what we want, but actually, it’s the other way around. We get what we want when we learn to be Happy.