“Is the route to Happiness Sam to get a man?” asked my friend Mike, in our group WhatsApp chat. “Do you think? In your experience?”
Hmmm. Good question.
When I recovered from the audacity, absurdity and arrogance of the question, I could see that it was indeed a good question. The short answer is no, of course the route to Happiness is not to get a man! In reality it’s not as simple as that. Many women, although they may not admit it, do they think they will be happy when they’ve found a man. (Boy are they in for a shock!) For many years I was one of those women!
I believe feeling the pain is the first and most important step on the journey to achieving Happiness. If we don’t allow ourselves to feel the pain, any other Happiness practices are just papering over the cracks.
Relationships – Happiness Tips for Surviving Social Isolation
As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, my biggest fear at this time is not whether I will survive the Coronavirus but whether my relationship will survive social isolation!
We’re a few weeks into social isolation now. I’ve lost count of what week we’re in, but I think it’s week five or six. I’m pleasantly surprised and relieved that apart from the meltdown mentioned in my Dark Night of the Soul post, Mr Sexy Pants (MSP) and I have been getting on very well.
In this post I share my tips for helping your relationship survive social isolation. I have also included some tips for singletons.
We not Me – Happiness Tips for Surviving Social Isolation
In this next post of the Happiness Tips for Social Isolation series we look at the “We not Me” culture that is currently spreading across the planet.
It has been said that doing things for others is one way to achieve fulfillment. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs lists love and belonging including a sense of connection as the third need and self-actualisation – being the best we can be – as the top need. Similarly, leading life coach Tony Robbins says, “Only those who have learned the power of sincere and selfless contribution experience life’s deepest joy: true fulfillment”.
It is truly inspiring to see the abundance of selfless initiatives that have sprung up during this time of crisis. In this post we offer some suggestions to cultivate the ‘we not me’ mentality in your life.
Self-Care – Happiness Tips for Surviving Social Isolation
In the second post of the Happiness Tips for Social Isolation series we look at self-care.
I am very impressed with the we not me mentality that has emerged as a result of the current situation. However, I do believe that our own self-care must come first. When we fly, parents are advised to apply their own oxygen masks before applying their children’s mask. This is because parents can’t help their children if they have passed out. In the same way, we are only able to help others when we are on top form ourselves. We cannot fill another’s cup if our own cup is empty.
Here are my tips for self-care during social isolation:
Stars Can’t Shine Without Darkness – Third in the series of The Social Isolation Diaries
11th April 2020
Thank you so much to everyone who read my ‘Dark Night of the Soul’ post. I am sitting here writing the next post and my mind was searching for a suitable quote about light and darkness. I remembered that Mr Sexy Pants (MSP) bought me a notepad last year and on the front, there was a quote: “Stars Can’t Shine Without Darkness”. (Isn’t he adorable? He hasn’t got a spiritual bone in his body and yet somehow he chose the most perfect item for me).
My dark night of the soul blog post was originally written to a few friends on Wednesday evening, when I was at a pretty low ebb. Writing my feelings down was so cathartic. It brought me a lot of peace and clarity. I have felt so much better for the last couple of days.
My Dark Night of the Soul – Second in the series of The Social Isolation Diaries
Wednesday 8th April 2020
I want to share how I’m feeling.
The first couple of weeks of lockdown I felt great. I was maintaining all my Happiness practices. I was so proud of myself.
Then I was starting to feel increasingly overwhelmed with working on Happiness Club on top of working full-time. I was feeling stressed all the time with constant headaches. I have even been waking up in the morning with headaches. I talked to my angels and guides and said “Come on guys. I need your help. If you want me to do Happiness Club, then I need some help.”
Work has also been quite stressful, and we have a challenging situation going on with Andy’s Mum.
(I’m sitting here crying my eyes out as I write this).
It is the 2nd week of lockdown during the Coronavirus crisis in the UK. I’m enjoying some much-needed quiet time.
When they started talking at work about us taking our laptops home every night, I didn’t take it too seriously. Although after a few days I did start to stow my laptop away in my pink rucksack and take it home with me every evening. The thought of lockdown secretly excited me. I also found the idea of working from home appealing. I thought it would give me lots of extra time to relax and work on Happiness Club.
In this series of blog posts, I will share my Happiness tips for surviving social isolation.
So far, I have managed to remain in high spirits on the whole. I have to admit I am a bit scared of catching Coronavirus. My biggest fear though is social isolation. You may be surprised to know that I am an introvert at heart. I love spending time quiet time alone at home with the cats or with my boyfriend, Andy, affectionately known as Mr Sexy Pants (MSP). The thought of being stuck at home for an indefinite period causes me to feel quite uncomfortable though. I’m also worried that MSP or I might die – not because of the Coronavirus – but because we’ve killed each other. If we do live to tell the tale, will we still love each other? Will our relationship last the distance?
In these posts, I will be sharing the steps that I will be taking for me – and my relationship – to survive.
In this first blog post we take a closer look at what we focus on.